Quote Of The Week: Frank Crane

"You may be deceived if you trust too much, but you will live in torment if you do not trust enough"  ~Frank Crane

Relationship Rehab: 12 Steps To Becoming A Happier Couple In 2012

By Natalie Gontcharova

Your 12-step program to a better, healthier relationship.

What's your New Year's resolution for 2012? To exercise more? To be more productive? We bet "a more honest and open relationship" isn't on many of your lists. That's because tons of people put their relationships on autopilot, hoping the kinks will just work themselves out — and then they argue each and every day, and end up resenting each other. The best way to have a happy relationship is to keep working on it, so even if you're not currently in a relationship rut, follow these 12 tips from our staff and you'll keep being happy.

1. Say "please" and "thank you." This shows your partner you appreciate them and keeps you from taking each other for granted. 

2. Grab your partner's butt every day (or at least every other day).

3. Kiss every morning!

4. Say "good morning" every morning.

5. Cuddle.

6. Spend at least one night a week with your significant other and family/friends, i.e. don't hole up all by yourselves.

7. Use baby talk/pet names very sparingly. If you overuse these, you could damage your relationship since you won't be able to relate to each other seriously.

8. DO THE DISHES. Set up some type of system for who does them when.

9. Practice listening.

10. Practice honesty, even when it's uncomfortable.

11. If you and your partner are indecisive about where to eat or what movie to watch, play the "5-3-1" game. One person names five choices, the other vetoes two of them, and then the first person eliminates the remaining two. Ta-da, no more "Where you do want to eat?" "I don't care, what do you want to do?" (From 8 Relationship Tricks Happy Couples Use)

12. If you live together, make sure you each still have your own private space where you can retreat to work, think, or partake in bizarre grooming rituals that the other person wouldn't want to see.

Article Source:http://www.yourtango.com/2012130043/10-steps-happier-relationship-2012


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Stop Being Too Nice

By  Felicity MacKaye


One of the most prominent beliefs women have about dating is that they should be “nice girls” – the kind of women who are willing to make a commitment to make their relationship the biggest priority in their lives. They are happy to put their man first and devote considerable time and attention to growing their relationship. They try to be agreeable and take their man’s wants and needs to heart whenever they make any decision so the relationship is as smooth and conflict-free as possible.

Unfortunately, men have a different idea of what a “nice girl” is. When men think of “nice girls,” they think of someone who has no life of her own and who can’t make decisions for herself. She’s a girl who doesn’t know what she wants, doesn’t have much self confidence, and who welcomes a relationship with any guy who wants her. She isn’t much of a challenge because she’s willing to drop everything if he needs her and she will bend over backwards at his beck and call.

Some women approach relationships as the subservient partner. They let their man take the reins over who she is, who she interacts with, and what she does. Sometimes they will even stop doing things they enjoy because their man doesn’t want her to continue. They start to dress in the way their man wants them to. They take up his interests and hobbies. And they support him in his life goals – to the detriment of their own self-image and personal goals.

The problem with this approach lies in self-respect. If you are willing to do what it takes to “make a relationship work” with any old guy – to the point where you compromise your interests – you are giving away your power. And no one can respect someone who doesn’t respect herself.

Respect is a crucial component to any healthy relationship, and without it, the relationship dies.

The truth is that quality men don’t want to take control of your life. They want an engaging, positive woman who runs her own life, and whom they can spend time with.

It is absolutely essential to put yourself first, voice your own opinions, and pursue your dreams.

We teach others how to treat us by the way we treat ourselves. The more you exude uncertainty, indecisiveness, and doubt, the more likely you will attract others to you who will walk all over you.
They act by example. If you don’t respect yourselves, no one else will.

The solution to this problem is to develop a healthy disregard of what other people think. Yes, sometimes another person’s feedback is helpful and constructive, but if you constantly assess your own worth based on what other people think, what the media deems as the “perfect” woman, or how others define “success,” you are setting yourself up for failure.

No matter what you do, you won’t be able to please everyone. And the more you try to please everyone, the more you ignore your own needs and wants.

Instead of spending all your time focusing on who your parents, friends, dates, coworkers and others think you should be, respect yourself enough to follow your dreams and prioritize your passions. It’s your responsibility look out for your own best interests.




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Balancing College and Relationships

By Victoria Riollano


Do you find yourself overwhelmed with school work and your relationships? If you do, join the crowd!

Entering college is single-handedly one of the most exciting experiences that many people will encounter. Navigating the hallways of school, being introduced to crazy new roommates, and gaining the "freshmen fifteen" are things many of us can relate to. Not to mention the schoolwork that never ceases to end! Adding a relationship into the mix seems to magnify the intensity of college. How does one manage to complete all the course work, rest, and hang out with their partner or roomies? The answer is simple, time management.

Let’s face facts, most of us would rather go to the movies or the mall than write a paper or study for a test. In fact, some people would rather skip class than  learn. After all, no one is forcing you to attend or really keeping tabs after the first week or two. The truth of the matter is that the purpose of college is to learn about your desired field  to help you in your future career. In other words, it would be wise to restructure your time so that you can maximize your college experience.

Here are a couple of tips that can help you manage…

Prioritize- Create a list of what is the most important for you right now? Be specific, which classes require the most studying, and which ones are your “easy A’s”?

Schedule-Create a schedule and stick to it. Schedule your study times and your hanging out times and stick to it. For instance, if you only have class on Tuesday and Thursday, you may want to dedicate Monday and Wednesday from 10:00 AM- 12:30 PM for studying. This leaves your whole weekend open for fun. Make this schedule realistic for you. If you are the type that needs to study for hours, schedule that. However, if you can pass a test by taking notes in class and skimming the material later, you may not need to set aside as much time. Be sure to schedule time to hang out also!

Consider extending your study time- Spread out the study time instead of cramming at the last minute. Doing this gives you more wiggle room if an emergency comes up and you can not study the day or two before the test. This will relieve some of the stress of the test and allow you to spend time with your partner without feeling guilty about not studying the entire time.



Article Sorce:http://www.examiner.com/twentysomething-relationships-in-mobile/balancing-college-and-relationships




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