In A Sentimental Mood -Duke Ellignton & John Coltrane

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Poem Of The Week: A Blues For Nina

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Can I Walk With You India Arie

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Teenage Love Affair -Alicia Keys

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These Are The Times -Dru Hill

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How to Resolve Trust Issues in a Relationship

Nobody likes to be fighting with a loved one, but a loss of trust causes serious problems. Trust issues are hard to overcome and often keep popping up. You and your partner must resolve your trust issues if you are to move toward a more healthy relationship.

Instructions:

Talk it out. This seems obvious, but when two people in a relationship talk, it helps if the couple trusts each other. Building trust can be especially hard with someone you're in a relationship with because that person has the power to hurt you. By practicing constant communication and keeping it open and honest, trust can be slowly built, or rebuilt.

Forget the past. Don't hold on to old hurts. Everyone's been hurt, and you need to work through those issues, not hold on to them and shove them in the other person's face. This will only make things worse, and it won't resolve anything. The important thing is to not dwell on the things that happened.

Focus on the present. Don't let your mind think about the bad things that could happen. When you focus on what could be, you're heading down a road that destroys trust. Banish negative thoughts and think about what IS happening, not what could happen.

Take it slowly. Take your relationship day by day and communicate daily as well. Don't expect all of your walls to come crumbling down overnight--it takes work, and time.

Article Source:http://www.ehow.com/how_2314162_resolve-trust-issues-relationship.html



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Lyrics Of The Week: Fool For You

Fool For You
Cee-lo & Melanie Fiona


Cee-Lo:
YYYYYYYYEAH! AYYYYYYYEEE!
Whats that real, that deep, that burnin, that amazing, unconditional, inseperable LOVE!
That feel like forever, that always emotional but still exceptional LOVE!
Can’t nobody tell me nothin, it is what it is!
ANDDD every mistake you make EYE! EYE! just may forgive!
OHH! Right now! Right now! at this very moment, still love her like I loved her then!
OHH! I love her in and out and up and down and round and round and all ova and all ova again!
Sooo rare they swear that YOUUU! just dont exist!
ANDDD! its only one person I can think of make me feel like this!
Chorus:
I’m a foooooooooool!
Such a fooooooool!
For Youuuuuuuu!

Melanie:
OHH! So sweet, so deep, so real, ooo-wee! GOT DAYUM! thats some powerful stuff!!
OHH! How ya do it, just do do it, keep me coming, baby I cant seem to get enough!
What you do, what you say, makes me wanna LUH LUH luv ya baby, I dont even have a choice!
OHH! and if i did, it still be youuu! cuz you the man among these other boys!
Sweet suga, I surrender, white flag, ohh I wont even put up a fight!
OHH! cuz there aint a dayum thing wrong about this kind of lovin ooo when it feels so right!!
Gonna, write a letter, tell it to my momma and she gone tell the world that I love YOU!
OHH! Some people probably say im crazy but I dont mind being a fool for youuuu!

Chorus:
I’m a foooooool! (Mel: Ima fool) Such a foooool!
(Mel: Such a fool, such a fool, such a fool! )
For youuuuuuu! (Mel: for youuuuuaahhhh)

Breakdown:
I say YEAHHHHHH! YEAHHHHH!
YEAHH! (Mel: YEAHH!)
(Mel: Ima fool baby!)
ooooo chile!
(Mel: ooooooooooooooo!)
Ima fool! (Mel: Ima fool!) Sucha fool!
(Mel: Like a fool!) Ima fool! (Mel: ayeeee ayeee!)
ooo baby! AHohhhh! (Mel: AHohhhh!)
ayee lawd! baby!
(Background: ima fool! ima fool! ima fool! ima fool! ima fool! ima fool!)
For you momma! (Mel: For you daddy!)
Please baby beggin ahhh have mercy on me! (Mel: Pleaseeeee!)
Have mercy! Have a little mercy on me! ooo wee!
(Mel: Show a little mercy baby! uhhh!)
(Mel: AHHHHHHHOH! ooooyeahhh!) oooyeahhh!
For you (Mel: ima fool! Ima fool! IMA FOOL!)



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How to Grow Old Together

If you've been with your partner for a while, maybe the two of you are going through a life transition. Perhaps when you first met, the biggest argument you had was about where to go on Friday night. Now you are ready to take those next steps: getting jobs, houses, pets and paying bills. Following these steps will help you get you and your partner on the right track.


Instructions:

Decide that you want to grow old with your partner, and talk about if you are both ready. If only one person is ready for more responsibility, then it is not going to work. Harboring doubts about your partner makes the process more difficult.

Figure out exactly what "growing old" means for the two of you. Perhaps it means that it is time to have a home and family. Maybe it just means that you accept responsibility for all the things that come with adulthood. Growing old together has different meanings for everyone. Make sure that you and your partner are on the same page.

Make plans and stick to them. Growing old together also means being responsible and trustworthy. Create a calendar of things you want to do and follow through.

Pay your bills on time and be financially stable. Set aside one day a month when you go through all your finances and pay all your bills together.

Spend time with other people together. Do special things together, like going to dinner for dad's birthday or attend a holiday  together.

Practice being respectful of yourselves and others. Stop the petty fighting, put the past behind you and focus on your future together.

Review your progress. Taking control of your behavior and finances are important. If the two of you have been able to help each other toward that goal, then your relationship is healthy.

Article Source:http://www.ehow.com/how_2107556_grow-old-together.html




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Baby -Ashanti

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Lyrics Of The Week: No One Gonna Love You

No One Gonna Love You
-Jennifer Hudson

Aha! Hmmm! Hmm
I, I, I, I've been through some things,
Please don't hold that against me,
Can't nobody love you like I'm gonna love you
Can't nobody love you like I'm gonna love you
Even though I, I, I still can feel a sting,
No need to second guess me,
Can't nobody love you like I'm gonna love you
Can't nobody love you like I'm gonna love you

See I, I, I, I, I don't mind you
Putting up a little bit of fight, it's alright,
But why run from what's gonna hold you tight
Through any complications, baby, maybe we can start tonight!

I saw the burning that you gave me
Don't care what your ex do,
Ain't nobody love you like I'm gonna love you!
Ain't no one gonna love you, like I'm gonna love you!
And if you dare, don't dare,
Send me straight to voice mail,
Baby I'm just gonna text you,
Hope it ain't no issue, I just gotta let you
Know no one to love you like I'm gonna love you!

See I, I, I, I, I don't mind you
Putting up a little bit of fight, it's alright,
But why run from what's gonna hold you tight
Through any complications, baby, maybe we can start tonight!

Oh, oh, oh!
I could put on everything!
Ain't no one, no, no,
Ain't no one, no, no,
Show you what I could!
Somebody better told you!
Baby, your name's sprung up in every heartbeat!
Ain't no one, no, no,
Ain't no one, no, no,
Show you what I could!

But if you should go down that same road,
You've been before,
You're in reverse, your pain for her, just push yourself for love
But don't you know that you could just let it go?
Don't you know
I, I, I, I've been through some things,
Please don't hold that against me,
Can't nobody love you like I'm gonna love you
Can't nobody love you like I'm gonna love you
Don't you know I, I, I, I, I'm making you this promise,
Catchin' all the rosary
Ain't no one gonna love you, like I'm gonna love you!
Ain't no one gonna love you, like I'm gonna love you!
Oh, oh, oh, oh!

[Ad-libs]


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Does He Love You If He Never Keeps a Promise?

By Maura Kelly

You'd think that if a guy really loved you, he'd never break a promise he made to do something for you, right? He'd come over on Saturday to help you hang that print you just got framed like he said he would, instead of having a Bloody Mary-rich brunch with his brother. You wouldn't have to ask him more than once to simply send you a quick text every night to say "Sleep tight" during his long-planned two-week road trip with his best buddy. You wouldn't have to tell him 15 times over the course of a month that he really shouldn't wear those New Balance running shoes when he's doing anything but running. Right?

Wrong. Apparently, as New York Times columnist David Brooks pointed out in a recent piece, people who love us are more likely to break their promises to us than those who don't, according to new research by psychologists Lara Kammrath and Johanna Peetz. "That’s because they are driven by affection to make lavish promises in the first place," Brooks writes. "They really mean it at the time, but lavish promises are the least likely to be kept."

Hmmm. Interesting as the finding was, Brooks' explanation seemed a little flimsy. I wondered if there was more to it than that. I'd think that the people who love us are more likely not to keep certain vows because they don't think have to prove themselves to us, so they let things slide or get a little sloppy. Put another way: They feel more comfortable with us and assume we won't get too upset if they forget some little offer or statement.

I investigated a little more and found out neither Brooks nor I was quite right. After reviewing a few recent reports by Kammrath and Peetz, Heidi Grant Halvorson, Ph.D., wrote in a Psychology Today piece: "In their studies, the researchers found that while feelings of love are quite good at predicting … in-the-moment acts of kindness and generosity, they do a lousy job of predicting the more challenging, longer-term loving behaviors," she wrote. "When it comes to pulling off the latter, they found that it's how conscientious you are, rather than how much in love you are, that predicts success."
In other words, if you're kind of up-tight, obsessive, or simply fastidious about most things, you're going to follow through on promises made to the person you love. If, on the other hand, you're more of a slacker, or a little forgetful, you're less likely to do what you said you would. It has very little to do with love, and a lot to do with personality.

Or, as Halvorson explains it: "Some gestures of love are spontaneous … it occurs to you to do something nice for your partner, and you act on that thought immediately, or in the very near future. Saying 'I love you,' offering a back rub … [or] surprising your girlfriend with a gourmet dinner — these are examples of loving actions that don't require much in the way of forethought, planning, or memory. Other gestures have a much higher degree of what Kammrath and Peetz call 'self-regulatory challenge.' They are harder to perform, often because they have to be maintained over longer periods of time (e.g., remembering to do household chores without being asked, being nice to one's in-laws) or because there is a delay between the thought and the action (remembering to buy … a gift for her birthday next week, keeping a promise to call home during your conference in Las Vegas)."

She concludes that if you're trying to get a sense of how your boyfriend really feels about you, the "smaller, spontaneous acts of love that occur without much forethought are a much better indicator of the depth of his love" than whether or not he remembers your birthday or to take out the trash.


Article Source:http://www.marieclaire.com/sex-love/dating-blog/keeping-promises-in-relationships




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No One Gonna Love You -Jennifer Hudson

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I Should Have Cheated -Keyshia Cole

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Frontin' -Pharrell & Jay-Z

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Love's Little Blind Spots

By Tim Jarvis
Oprah.com | From the April 2008 issue of O, The Oprah Magazine

The power of your partner's self-absorption—how he or she can sit so cheerfully through dinner, oblivious to the fact that you're visibly upset, for example—may amaze you, but don't write off the relationship so fast. There are a couple of good excuses to explain such clueless behavior, and they're likely to apply to you as well.

The first excuse has to do with an innocent brain glitch called attentional blink. Originally described by Canadian scientists in 1992, it occurs in certain circumstances when, for a split second, "we literally become unconscious of what might be happening right in front of us," says Richard Davidson, PhD, professor of psychology and psychiatry at the University of Wisconsin–Madison. Researchers can elicit the blink by showing subjects a rapid stream of numbers on a computer screen and asking them to hit a button every time they see a 3. When two 3s appear closely together, Davidson says, almost nobody hits the button twice. "It's as if the mind gets stuck on the occurrence of the first and misses the second."

This is particularly true when we're in a heated or passionate interchange. "With emotional cues, our attention is very sticky," he explains.

"We tend to grasp onto certain things, which is really what causes us to miss the others. Rubbernecking on the freeways is an example of attentional grasping." Davidson's latest research showed, however, that three months of intensive vipassana—or insight—meditation significantly reduced attentional blink. "Vipassana increases awareness of one's surroundings in a nonjudgmental, nonreactive way," Davidson says, but he believes any kind of meditation, even 20 minutes a day, could make spouses better at reading each other's subtleties.

There's another reason people fail to notice their lover's gestures, expressions, or words: "If you're doing well as a couple, basically you have a reservoir of goodwill, so he can be momentarily neglectful or mean-spirited, and it's discounted," says Timothy W. Smith, PhD, a psychology professor at the University of Utah who studies the effects of marital interactions on health. "But couples not doing so well are quick to make a great deal of the lapse." Smith agrees that meditation can help spouses connect with more clarity and awareness.

Davidson recommends starting with a simple meditation of focusing on your breath; when your mind wanders, notice how it's distracted, and come back to your breathing. With regular practice, he says, "I believe a couple would be able to pick up more information about each other's emotional state and do it in a way that is not judgmental. The combination of those two things bodes quite well for improving interpersonal relationships."


Article Source:http://www.oprah.com/relationships/Get-and-Give-Attention-in-Your-Relationship/print/1



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Lyrics Of The Week: Night and Day

Night and Day
Al B. Sure


Woo
Ah, can you feel it, baby
I can
Ooh
Excuse me, do you think that I might be able to touch you
{Who me}

I can tell you how I feel about you night and day
How I feel about you (No, no)
I can tell you how I feel about you night and day
How I feel about you

I'll love you more in the rain or shine
And makin' love in the rain is fine
A love so good and I call it mine
Love is blind

I can tell you how I feel about you night and day
How I feel about you (No, no, no)
I can tell you how I feel about (Woo) you night and day
How I feel about you (Ho, oh...)

Believe me when I say that I do care (I can tell you)
I'd like to run my fingers through your hair (I can tell you)
Baby, if you left I could not bear (I can tell you)
Please don't share

Do you love me, please let me know (I can tell you)
Don't hide the feeling, just let it show (I can tell you)
A feeling so deep that comes within (I can tell you)
What kind of love am I in, ooh...

I can tell you how I feel (Uh, ho) about you night and day
How I feel about you (No, no, no)
I can tell you how I feel (Ooh) about you night and day
How I feel about you (Ho, oh...)

If you and I were one, girl
The love we'd share would be so fun
Just take my hand and you'll see, girl
That we'd take off into another world

I can tell you how I feel about you (Ooh) night and day (Uh-huh)
(Uh-huh, uh-huh, uh)
I can tell you how I feel (Woo) about you night and day
(I'll love you more in the rain or shine)

I can tell you how I feel about you night and day
(Night and day, night and day, night and day)
I can tell you how I feel (Woo) about you night and day
(Making love in the rain is fine)

I can tell you how I feel about you night and day
I can tell you how I feel about you night and day



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Bonnie & Clyde -Beyonce & Jay-Z

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Letting Go of the Past So You Can Enjoy Your Future

It's human nature to sometimes hold onto an event that has hurt, disappointed, or severed a relationship. No matter how long ago it happened, the wound can still be deep and hard to heal. But there are ways and things that you can do to help the healing process.

When a relationship is broken, one of the parties may not understand why or what happened that brought the relationship to an end. So it may help to discuss the issue with the person that was involved. It shouldn't be a conversation that stirs up an argument, but it should be more of a conversation to gain information for the benefit of both parties. For instance, you can ask if there was something that you could have done to prevent the problems or was there something that you should have done that you didn't. Although it doesn't sound like this would make a difference, it can bring closure to a situation so that you can get past it and move on with your life.

Since every person is different, they all have different ways to handle certain situations. But they shouldn't dwell on the "what ifs". They think, "what if" they would have done this, or "what if" they would have done that. But regardless of the question or answer it will not make the current situation any better. Mulling it over in the mind only adds to the problem and can bring about more issues to deal with.

When a person gets hurt, it can be devastating and many times their hurt turns into anger, anger into bitterness, and bitterness into unforgiveness. Living with unforgiveness has a way of damaging our mental, physical, emotional, and spiritual health. For this reason it is important to forgive those that hurt you so that you can prevent other areas of your life from suffering.

Not only is it important to forgive the person that hurt you, it's important that you forgive yourself as well. We all have things that we struggle with, and there isn't anyone that is perfect. Yes you made a mistake but you have to forgive yourself for your part in the situation. Holding on to that guilt isn't good for you and will actually restrict you from enjoying your life.


Article Source:http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/507231/letting_go_of_the_past_so_you_can_enjoy.html?cat=5



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Quote Of The Week: Jesus, John 15:12

This is my commandment, that ye love one another, as I have loved you.
~ Jesus, In John 15:12



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Poem Of The Week: Love?

By Monica


Love always seems to be true...

But when you need love to come through...

It will abandon you.

Love will blind you...

No one can find you.

You ignore friends...

and break what were to be long lasting mends.

Love will always hurt...

when it throughs you in the dirt.

But when love is true...

like the sky is blue...

It will save you.

Many people look everywhere...

and never notice the one thats there.


Source:http://www.ihatemen.com/poems.cfm?catid=7&status=1


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